Raising Awareness of Mental Health

Mental Health is an issue I want to unpack and discuss in-depth with my blog, so this post will be just the beginning in what I hope to be a nice sized collection, and it should be the only one that isn’t researched, referenced and written to plan.

I am sorry for this, but I am on a roll right now between assignments and I while I have this in my head I need to spit it out. So lets treat this as the introduction to my future discussions.


Raising awareness for Mental Health.

This has come along way. With Social Media we are sharing alot of awareness for a lot of important issues, and some awareness raising has really saved lives through sharing stories and raising funds for organisations that work on the issues (not just mental health issues- general health issues and socio issues included).

This year I have seen a surge of talk around Post Traumatic Stress Disorder which I don’t believe has gotten any attention previously and is still currently completely underrated in its effects.


So this has been ticking my head as I see images and shareable texts floating around Facebook accounts. I also came across video’s by Thomas Sanders – I love his humor and his ability make content that is hilarious without being taken at the expense of others.

I laughed at a few video’s that laughed at how hard adulthood is, at jokes for overcoming social anxiety and crippling fear of not achieving much in life etc etc etc….


These jokes are relatable to people of any age, but specifically for my generation. I see articles lately telling me the Aussie Dream is changing, that young adults are now seeking apartments instead of homes with sizable yards.

I don’t remember the dream changing. I don’t remember anyone my age choosing to look for an apartment life over a private property for any reason other than it being within their means.

I don’t for a second believe that any dreams have changed, but the circumstances of the times have lead people to settle for what they can get.

Which brings me back to the jokes around social and mental issues and ‘raising awareness’. The point of these jokes and images is to start discussions and to make it more acceptable to talk about this topics, to ditch the stereotypes that bring shame to those who suffer from these issues.


But today when I think about it I don’t see it as being much easier to talk about. All I see is the issues being normalised. We may be happy to raise our hand and say we have suffered from depression, or anxiety, but fixing this issues? Where has that gone?

It particularly hit me when I read an article “4 Signs of High-Funcioning Depression and Anxiety”.

I’m sorry, WHAT?

Yep. I read it and I read about myself.

Being able to wake up and drag myself around work with a mask on, only to come home tear it off and dive straight back into bed. Letting takeaway food containers litter my room, not showering or dressing unless it was for work or to sneak to the store for food.

This is ‘High Functioning” because you can still put on a face for some hours of the day so that you don’t become broke, starving and homeless.

High functioning sounds quite positive doesn’t it? I’m sure many with crippling depression read this and wish they had that, just so that they could avoid the concrete problems associated with not showing up at work at all.

The article included a tweet of a girl who showed her room filled with trash, during her depression and the one day she had energy she managed to clean the whole room and that was the highest point she had had in a long time.

I’ve been there, and I have been there as recently as this year.

I don’t doubt for a second that thousands have done this as well. Why is this still happening when we are so open to talking about and raising awareness about it?

Because we are normalising it. We are seeing how widespread it is and bringing the standard down to that level- and this is NOT ok.


This is something I definitely want to change. Feeling happy and normal should not seem like a life long goal to try and attain. It is the most basic benchmark that every individual should possess, in my opinion- and it is something that I very much want help to change.


I have been procrastinating again today with my study. Part of my day I spend reflecting on my year and the change I have experienced in recent months. While I am undergoing some stress with work, moving, completing my assignments and getting fit again – I am extremely happy and grateful at this time.

I thought back to 4 or 5 months ago, and it was another person entirely. It was a girl who was crying, binge eating, and lying in bed all day watching youtube true crime vidoes and sleeping all weekend to retain energy for a monday-friday. Tired 24/7. And this was society’s definition of ‘High Functioning depression’.


Well it is not something I call high functioning, and it not something I want to normalize for anybody else. I would really like to see some change in the way we are romanticizing mental health and the other issues that branch from here. We don’t need to be accepting these issues, we need to be making changes and creating real solutions.


So this is it for now – I want to unpack the many issues around mental health, I want to brainstorm idea’s to change how we are treating it as a society and I am more than happy to share my own experiences if it means anything. I told you out the outset I needed to spit this out so apologies for the non existent structure- but you were warned! (Trust me, it pains me, English is my favourite subject but my brain is mush and I cannot wrap up a decent conclusion so I refuse to try tonight).

So until my next 2 assignments are submitted, I won’t have time to start writing about anything but it will come, there is so much I want to talk about and I will talk about it.


As always, if you do need someone to talk to, you can always reach out to me. I am not the most reliable or stable myself – but I have an impressive record of listening to many many people from all over about all sorts of underlying problems and it has never been a burden.


You are never a burden.



Procrastinator Queen

Something that has been bugging me alot lately is how often I am telling people I am very busy, when I am very aware of how much time I spend doing nothing.
I am busy! But I make it so much worse by putting tasks off and then stressing out trying to get them done with limited time. I become irritable with myself for putting myself in a stressful situation and I get snappy at others in response to the stress I am feeling (that I created remember). 
Strangely, I’m not like this at work. My job changes a bit everyday so it can be chaotic but I work in a constant state of prioritising tasks so everything is done on time. 
When I get home I turn into a sloth. 

When I do tasks, I try to  multitask or my heart isn’t in it.

So, I have a game plan I started to implement and today is the day I make all the changes official. My goal is to focus on the things I am doing and giving 100%. To prioritize my tasks, and to get rid of the distractions in my life.

  • A weekly to do list/planner in plain sight – having goals and a vision for each week will make sure I chip away at tasks in a timely manner, as well as planning in shopping, cooking, appointments and gym sessions. No rushed assignments, takeaways or missed gym or appointments allowed!
  • Social media/app/technology spring clean – playing hardball on all this. Bye bye to the time wasters- logging off or uninstalling. I’m not quitting entirely but I am controlling my use by logging out so I dont have the ease of clicking on an app and losing time acrolling. Entering a password gives me a moment to think about if I have time right now or an unfinished task that I need yo complete.
  • Spring clean facebook- bye pages and groups and adverts that clog my feed and seep into my subconsicous!
  • Updating my vision board- its nearly 2 years old and so I went through and took off what wasnt inspriing and added more. Definitely feeling invigorated and focused.
  • House spring clean – uncluttering life
  • Using my whiteboard- using this to write my big goals or nearest goals like the next assignment due date.
  • Bedtimes – my sleep is being affected by my procrastination! If I am lazy on a gym session or assignment I end up going late or working late, then sleeping on the weekends to ‘catch up’. Or, my stress keeps me waking up periodically. A bed time with phones off etc sets a great routine abe adequate sleep brings new meaning to life.

    These are such simple things but together they have been responsible for a lot of my chewed up time. Time I could be spending working on my goals or having fulfilling down time with. 
    If anyone has any suggestions they found worked let me know- I identified my biggest time wasters and based my plan on them- but there could always be something I havent thought of! 

    Day One Mentality 

    Today my boyfriend made a solid attempt at suppressing a giggle when I said “tomorrow I get back to gym!” … 

    Let’s be honest, he has heard that nearly every week for the past few months!

    I was happy to blame everything under the sun for that- including him! Too many dates around his hectic work schedule and pure laziness on my behalf.

    But really, there is no excuse. You put first your priorities, and it has obviously not been my priority for awhile. I have been inconsistent and my heart hasn’t been in it. Ive enjoyed my sedentry lifestyle a bit too much and now I don’t like it anymore. 
    I miss bouncing out of bed early every morning and tackling every day with enthusiasm. Thats what a healthy routine gives me and for awhile I was happy to just relax and let work take a priority. Most of us do! 

    There is a thing called life that needs to be lived!
    One thing I know I, and many of us do, is develop this ‘day one’ mentality where we make one golden day where our new plan or lifestyle has to start. Usually this day has to go perfectly. Make it a January 1st, first day of a new month, on a monday- whatever- there just has to be that pinpointed day ONE.

    This mentality leads to many of us using the time between now and that day to act up impressively. Eat all the bad food because the diet has not yet started kind of behaviour. 
    What is wrong with this? Well it normally continues to be put off. We dont get around to starting, and in the mean time our bad habits have increased for an extended period of time. 

    I believe it is secretly a fear of failing- as technically you can’t fail if you haven’t started! So we feel safe in the fact that we haven’t begun and therfore our actions arent accountable. 

    Whats wrong with this?  

    It is a false safe net.

    Safe = Settled, Comfortable 

    Don’t delay starting. Don’t assign a ‘Day 1’ to begin chasing your goals. Plan and execute continuousy. Be fluid – start now, today, this minute. Get excited now and harness your resolve and motivation!
    This has been my pep talk to myself- don’t think. Just do. 

    What are your thoughts about using a Day 1? Do you see this mentality?

    Getting Started

    Getting started can be really difficult.
    One thing I have found hard to ‘start’ is blogging. For years I have endeavoured to make it something I do consistently, and yet it still hasn’t happened. 

    The excuses have ranges from lack of time or content idea’s to the all paralysing excuse of letting fear stop me. Reading and writing is something I have loved since I was small child but every year I get older as an adult I seem to have gotten further away from my joy. Filling my life with all sorts of things and not chasing my love for literature and art. 

    It’s starting to bug  me. I see inspirational posts about chasing your dreams but I just always apply that to those gym or career inspired goals instead of my actual dreams. 
    That is what my blog was originally for, the first time I made one. Then I was introduced to the ideas of branding and suddenly I was paralysed because I don’t know my “brand”. 

    I don’t want or like to have a brand. That sounds like selling and I hate selling. However, I have learnt that branding, image, selling- these aren’t just terms in business. 

    I will always have a target audience. I will always have something to offer. 

    But trying to define that and theme or write my blog ‘appropriately’ sucked the life out of my blogging attempts.

    Since I do love reading, I have also been worried about my writing style. I feel so out of practice in writing that I don’t know how exactly to bring together my voice. How to start, how to sign off, my point, my call to action?

    Sometimes I have an unpopular opinion. Am I scared of facing criticism? Yes. Am I worried I won’t articulate my point of viewing well enough? Definitely. 
    But today, I have been reading some blogs and thinking to myself- I am letting all of this fear of perfection stop me from starting. I am letting the fear of failure stop me at the gate. 

    I know that failure is the most readily available option, and that to succeed in anything we have to get mighty comfortable with failing often and failing big. Learning from mistakes to perfect the future. 
    I don’t need to be perfect or have personalised graphics and ads on my blog. I don’t need insane content in every post. My audience is likely to grow, to die, to change regularly. The only constant will be me, and I will change. I love changing, I love growth. There is nothing wrong with looking back in a years time and cringing at my past posts. That is life and I know I love looking  back at that, there is so much change and it is motivating.

    I dont want to look back in yet another years time and still have an empty blog. I started this in 2014, grabbing the URL as it is my favourite motto, used in my favourite tattoo. It’s so personal to me I wanted it and I want it to be something that lives. 
    So with these thoughts in my head today, I decided to throw them up here before I wrote off another writing idea. I know I am not alone with the challenge of blogging- there are so many group writing challenges that hundreds of people join- so I am far far far from alone in this!
    What fears have stopped you from posting? How have you pushed past? 

    Id love to hear🙂

    Resolutions by September

    Until recent years, I thought about resolutions between December and March and never inbetween.

    Recently, I was acheiving most of my resolutions.

    This year, however, I set myself so many resolutions that by March I burnt out, had a quarterlife crisis at my birthday, got back up then spread myself so thin over everything that I couldn’t achieve even one thing.

    Multitasking is a great skill, but when you abuse it, it doesn’t work at all.

    The fear of repeated failure can also sink in, paralysing you from even trying- which is what happened to me next. 
    I’ve spent the year no longer trying on any thing that I set for myself. This isn’t where I set out to be and it isn’t where I plan to stay. Failing is the most readily available option and we will fail repeatedly when we set ourselves good goals. Getting used to that gritty taste is important to getting to that winning outcome. 
    So, instead of writing off 2016, I am reassessing my resolutions and establishing new goals. I can still achieve and work on more than one thing, but in order to make great progress I need to prioritize my goals and put all of my energy in to one at a time. 

    I plan to finish this year off by studying like crazy and saving like a champ. Two goals I highly prioritise that can be done simultaneously without affecting the other. 

    The progress I make in the next 3 plus months will snowball and by reaching success quickly I will be motivated to hit my next projects. 

    We don’t need a new year, month or Monday to pull ourselves up. Time is fluid, it isn’t really in blocks all divided. We have alot of activities available to kill time- but I personally could do with reviving some lost time! We can’t get time back, so don’t write it off or let it sail past you!

    Use every second.
    How are your goals going? 

    Do you spread yourself thin as well? Have you written off this year or are you using it to the fullest? 

    Are you planning your next moves? 


    The crap thing about motivation is that you can’t rely on it. You can’t really conjure it up.. it can hit at inopportune times and evaporate when you need it. . So if you have it run with it. And if you don’t?  PUSH.
    Inbetween goals and projects is a thing called life that sometimes just needs to be done seperately.
    I felt like I was pushing for a really long time and I took a full year doing nothing but existing, floating..living.. and I needed it so badly. When I came away from that to push, motivation was nowhere- absolutely nowhere- at all and I pushed until I ran myself down and I stopped.

    One aspect of myself is that I am so incredibly lazy. And sometimes things come to me easily which reinforces my lazy behaviours and habits.
    If I think about it, its a sin to blessed with easy success and not harness that fully but I’m working to that.
    My point is so far this year I have had these goals that I have wanted for a long time and yet I have not been putting in even a pinch of work for it. But I have mentally pushed myself. Reminding myself repeatedly that my actions are what matters and that I need to walk the walk or shut up.

    We all work differently and that’s how I work until everything clicks and when it clicks… it fucking CLICKS.

    Tonight it clicked 👑


    The Next Version


    You are literally fighting with yourself when you try to make personal improvements. You are fighting your comfortable mentality, your previous choices, ingrained habits. You are going against your own grain and it can throw you into a confused state where you question and doubt yourself.

    Every mistake you make make more than once becomes a choice and a habit that dictates a pattern to the next decisive moment.

    So don’t be disheartened when you fail a thousand times over.
    Failure is always an option. It is the most readily available and popular option. Success is the rarity. So expect to fail but fight for the win. Never expect it to be easy.

    Life will most likely throw some curve balls your way, but this is what happens.  Everything changes and you need to bounce those hits and keep those eyes forward.
    Nothing worthwhile comes without sacrifice. See these challenges as the the obstacles that they are, as an indirect consequence of your actions rather than a victim mindset of the world trying to take you down. When you use this perspective you maintain control over your actions, your stress levels and your feelings.

    If you are tired, rest, but never quit.

    This is a Sign!


    An amazing Periscope broadcast.

    Toxic relationships. Ive been there. This was amazing to hear being on the free side and I wish I had heard it years ago.

    So I am sharing this wisdom. If you are unhappy, if you are mediocre, if your are undecided or constantly unsure this is your sign.


    Follow Ilyssa on Periscope @ohilyssa or Insta @ohilyssa
    This needs to be shared in high school. We need to hear this early in our Iives.

    Fear and Mindset

    “Fear is not real. It is a product of thoughts you create. Do not misunderstand me. Danger is very real. But fear is a choice.”

    -Cypher Raige 

    After Earth had this amazing quote spoken by Will Smith.

    Everyone fears.

    My biggest fear is heights, or so I tell everyone. That is a pretty reasonable fear as heights can pose a very real danger.

    But really sometimes my biggest fear is the same as millions of others of people and that is fear of being judged. So here I am preparing to get on stage with nothing to hide in allowing, asking, people to judge me aesthetically and I am going to prance around with such confidence and still say that I fear it.

    Insanity!! But maybe this is why I want to compete. To take ownership back from those fears. To break past that boundary so it is not a fear anymore.

    You can react to fears in many different ways and I am using mine to drive me to achieve something that I am uncomfortable about and to set a new standard of confidence and accomplishment for myself- regardless of the result on the day.

    Own your fears, they are your choices.

    8 weeks to go.

    Update 6Feb

    A quick update on current events.

    Now 8 weeks out from INBA.

    Posing advice and practice coming through thick and hard. I am really trying to embrace the ‘Fake it until you Become It’ attitude- due to work roster tomorrow will be my first group posing for nearly a month so we will see how well I can fake it with an audience again. Its cool to rock it in your home half naked and another to do it at the gym with 4 wall mirrors.

    I feel I am coming in on track for April but just trying to keep myself focused on everything at this point and not worry about the end day.

    My bikini order is in with Lovelee Swimwear and I cannot wait to get my order!

    It looks as though my event will be hosting a one-piece category so I am looking to order from All4Me but I am going to look at swatches with friends first and talk to the event organiser to get a better understanding of the category (judges looking for personality or promotability etc?) then I will have an idea of how I want to look.

    I have online posing coaching with the wonderful Skye at EdenFit I really encourage anyone to join her coaching online, she knows what she is talking about! You will learn a lot more than just posing.

    Otherwise I am just busy with work and study. Each Unit I swear I wont be in a rush to hand it in but so far it hasn’t gone this way…. maybe by my last unit! This month has already started on such a high as far my ambition goes I need to really pull some extra action out for everything I want to achieve. So excited still for this year!

    Enjoy some of my sketchy first poses. Lets see how much better I get -(hopefully way better!)


    8 weeks out is still considerable time but already I have the coaches asking me who I have organised for hair, makeup, tans, how is posing etc.. geez! The official event info went up this week so now I can look at organising these things in the next week or so. Going to recruit some friends tomorrow morning who are competing and see what we can organise together for the day.

    Part of me is feeling daring enough to try and hair and makeup myself, but the sensible side is wondering how I will cope with that on the day, and how I will feel if feedback comes back that I looked like a clown?